Category: Humor

Let’s be frank. Indonesian Sumatra is a pain in the ass. Anything that happens in Sumatra affects Malaysia. Any Indonesian action, or rather lack of, which concerns Sumatra, produces externality on Malaysia. Two clear examples are illegal land clearing via open burning and piracy in the Malacca Straits.

Granted, Indonesia, Malaysia and Singapore are responsible for the security in Malacca Straits. Yet, with vast undeveloped and swampy area in eastern Sumatra, Indonesia will need to do a lot more than what Malaysia and Singapore have been doing all along. Unfortunately for us all, Indonesia doesn’t have that kind of resources to start with. Subsequently, Indonesia’s inability to act within its own domain is producing negative externalities on its neighbors.

Malaysia, along with Brunei and Singapore are probably the most stable nations in Southeast Asia. Indonesia’s relative inability to act however is a threat to the three stable states. One way to stabilize the region is to internalize all Indonesian Sumatra’s problems, including their environmental and security mess.

Yes, in other words, one mean to solve all these problems is by making it exclusively our problems. Malaysia will need to encourage and convince all Sumatran states, perhaps including Aceh, into joining the Malaysian Federation. Once that happens, Malaysia will be able to make sure haze and even piracy along the busiest waterway in the world are things of the past. Apart from internalizing the environmental and piracy threat, imagine the wealth that will be made available to the Federation. More crude oil for us all, timbers, fishes, all the minerals. It will be as if Malaysia has just stumbled upon El Dorado.

Of course, the main issue remains the 250,000-strong Tentera Nasional Indonesia along with its pool of almost 60 million people according to CIA’s The World Factbook. In event of war, Malaysia’s only hope is for Indonesian fragile economy to collapse along with its cranking warships. If war ever broke up, an appropriate comparison would be the Iran-Iraq War where Iran had vast military reserve but with aging equipment while Iraq’s small but well-equipped force. The war was a stalemate but hey, Indonesia declared war on Malaysia back in the 1960s but we along with our allies kicked Jakarta and the commies’ ass. So, we might actually have a chance against Indonesia.

And hey! We know how hawkish Indonesia could be. Let’s see if they have the muscle to match their “ganyang Malaysia” spirit. After all, it was our frigate that rammed into an Indonesia’s warship in the name of Malaysian sovereignty over a piece of land under the Sunda Sea and Indonesia couldn’t do anything but accussed Malaysia of bullying them. And I doubt Indonesia has even repaired that warship.

But then, let’s give Indonesia’s retaliation a blind eye, assume that Indonesia’s economy will collapse, there will be no backlash from the international community and we all have nine lives. With so many assumptions, you’ve probably realized that I’m an economics graduate. Regardless, assuming Brunei accepts a re-invitation to join Malaysia as the new 14th state:

The new Malaysian Federation will look something like:

And we’ll probably need a new flag too. Our current flag would have too few lines. Unless, Sumatra is decreed as the fourth Federal Territory! Yeah, that’s more like it. We would be able to keep our pseudo-American flag! w00t!

O say does that Jalung Gemilang yet wave…
O’er land of meritokrasi, and the home of boleh.

Heh. Selangor should be particularly happy – the federal government would have little reason to appeal to Selangor for more land.

Or, instead of invading them, maybe Indonesia should just sign the ASEAN Agreement on Transboundary Haze Pollution.

Next entry on Malaysian federalism: Pattani.

p/s – I’ve just read Utusan Malaysia and someone finally mentioned about the haze agreement. But, heh, there are seven countries that have ratified the treaty, not six. Somebody needs to check his fact…

Malaysia was first accused as an agent of imperialism by Indonesia, and to a certain extent by the Philippines, back during the formation of Malaysian Federation. Both were against the formation of Malaysia which was supposed to encompass the Federation of Malaya, Singapore, Sarawak, Brunei and Sabah. War between Malaysia and Indonesia ensued later. In the end, Malaysia somehow won though Indonesia in the process managed to convince Brunei to opt out of the federation. Later, Singapore seceded, or kicked out of Malaysia, in 1965. And Malaysia has gone a long way since.

Now, in a time of uncertainty, it’s time Malaysia expands its frontier again. Yea!

We could definitely start with Brunei. The reason Brunei refused to participate in Malaysia was because of Indonesian influence. The rest is history. Today, Indonesia struggles to hold its own territories together and Indonesia’s influence on Brunei certainly has been reduced to nil. Hence, this is a perfect timing for Malaysian federal government to initiate talk with the Sultan of Brunei of a possible ascension of Brunei into Malaysia.

The benefit of Brunei’s ascension for Malaysia is aplenty. I’ll try to explain three of them.

First and foremost, such unification would increase trade by removing barriers that distort trade. Malaysian trade increase would probably be insignificant due to Brunei’s size but Brunei would definitely enjoy greater reap in term of percentage of GDP.

Second concerns natural resources, in particular crude oil and gas. What better way for Malaysia to secure a source of energy in light of rising oil price? Brunei could be the answer to Malaysia’s thirst for the black gold.

Thirdly, Spratly. Spratly is being claimed by multiple countries in the region, including Malaysia and Brunei. Brunei’s accession into Malaysia would strengthen Malaysia and Brunei’s case. And of course, with Spratly comes along superior inflow of black oil into Brunei and ultimately, should Brunei join the federation, Malaysia itself.

Should Brunei join Malaysia, certain arrangement could be made to soften the impacts of ascension. For instance, the Sultan of Brunei and Brunei itself could be given certain autonomy power, perhaps a power more generous than what both Sabah and Sarawak currently enjoy. Whatever the possible division of power between Brunei and Malaysia may be, in the long run, Brunei should embrace democracy complete with its participation in the Malaysian Parliament with the Sultan’s authority being balanced by the interest of common Bruneian (Do we call Bruneian as Bruneian?).

Steps towards the unification of Brunei and Malaysia could be done in the near future. Or, if it couldn’t, it would definitely be viable when oil in Brunei ran out. When Brunei ran out of its natural resources, it will be in Brunei’s best interest to join Malaysia.

Nice eh? Next time, we’ll talk other possibilities of strengthening out beloved federation.

So, before:

After:

For a greater Federation!p/s – hail to the Rainbow Warrior! 20 years ago on this day, the French government sabotaged a Greenpeace vessel. One died.

pp/s – the reasons I read Samizdata.net are here and here and here.